Today I had my blood drawn to check my progesterone since I was told to discontinue the PIO temporarily. That's what I was told last Thursday. When I asked about another beta, they said it wouldn't be necessary.
I second-guessed that decision up until 30 minutes before my draw when I called the clinic to ask them to add the beta to the orders.
I had almost convinced myself that with the numbers looking good from last week, and an ultrasound coming up next week, I could blissfully go about my days admiring how full my breasts seem to have gotten compared to when I was pregnant with Wolf and that all the mild cramping were signs of something growing.
Apparently I have Pseudocyesis.
The clinic agreed to add the beta to the order.
My beta on Thursday was 100.
Today it was 125.
Pregnancy No. 5 will be ending about the time I leave for my vacation, if not while on vacation.
Pregnancy no. 5 will be ending around Wolf's due date.
Happy 40th Birthday to me.
Fuck you, God.
Are they sure its that Pseudocyesis thing, your beta was still 125 the last go? You cant fake that, can you? I know I'm hanging on a short string here, but I'm gutted for you :(
Posted by: Artblog | June 06, 2007 at 06:26 AM
I am so, so sorry babe. I really am.
Posted by: Vanessa | June 06, 2007 at 07:49 AM
I am so sorry. I was so pulling for you.
Posted by: zandra | June 06, 2007 at 08:41 AM
SHIT.
Giving the pregnancy gods the finger on your behalf.
I am so so sorry.
Posted by: serenity | June 06, 2007 at 09:01 AM
DD...there are no words to convey how horrible I feel for you! This just plain sucks! :(
Next time you're heading this way, we should get a drink...or several. Perhaps a girl's night out sometime...?
Posted by: Brenda | June 06, 2007 at 09:09 AM
Ditto.
I'm so so sorry.
Posted by: Tracie | June 06, 2007 at 09:47 AM
I'm so very sorry, DD.
Posted by: S. | June 06, 2007 at 09:54 AM
This just sucks. How cruel. I feel for you more than you know...
Posted by: Pamela Jeanne | June 06, 2007 at 09:59 AM
This is just wrong. So completely wrong.
I am truly sorry, very, very sorry. You will be in my thoughts.
Posted by: Jitters | June 06, 2007 at 10:10 AM
I am deeply sorry.....
I will be thinking of you.
gentle hugs,
Martha
Posted by: Martha | June 06, 2007 at 10:21 AM
Oh fuck. This is just NOT RIGHT. There will be a LOT of alcohol coming to the beach--and a shoulder to cry on, if need be. I am so very, very sorry.
Posted by: Erin | June 06, 2007 at 12:09 PM
I'm so very sorry DD. Of course it's not pseudocyesis. You are pregnant, but the embryo just isn't developing. It's just absolutely awful, and of course the dates make it worse. I'm thinking of you.
Posted by: thalia | June 06, 2007 at 01:00 PM
I think we say sorry way too much - this time I'm going to say fuck. It's much more appropriate.
Posted by: Kellie | June 06, 2007 at 01:16 PM
Oh, damn it all. I am so extremely sorry.
Posted by: Jen | June 06, 2007 at 01:20 PM
I would like to add my sympathies... this is bullshit. Life is NOT fair, damnit.
Posted by: JenMac | June 06, 2007 at 01:57 PM
Crap.
Posted by: Katie | June 06, 2007 at 02:35 PM
fuck
Posted by: Heather | June 06, 2007 at 06:19 PM
I'm so sorry. It's so rotten. So awful. Words fail me. I'm so sorry.
Posted by: Anna | June 06, 2007 at 08:56 PM
Dammit. Dammit. I'm so sorry.
Posted by: Gretchen | June 06, 2007 at 09:20 PM
I don't know what to say. Fuck, indeed.
xx
Posted by: Drowned Girl | June 07, 2007 at 01:45 AM
Fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck. I'm checking in after a work-week from hell to see that...fuck, DD. I just don't know what to say. I am so fucking sorry.
Posted by: Adrienne | June 08, 2007 at 12:09 AM
No, no, no, no. FUCK!
I'm crying. I'm angry. I'm so so sorry. Stupid shitty stupid ARGH fuck!
Posted by: gypsyhick | June 08, 2007 at 11:03 AM
Unbelievably cruel.
Fuck.
Posted by: Menita | June 09, 2007 at 09:23 PM
I am so very sorry. Don't know what else to say. It's all so unfair.
Posted by: beagle | June 11, 2007 at 09:35 AM